


mr. and mrs. yamada

by thunderylee



Category: Japanese Actor RPF, KAT-TUN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, F/M, Minor Gunplay, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Violence, mr and mrs smith parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-24
Updated: 2011-12-24
Packaged: 2019-01-22 11:25:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12480480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderylee/pseuds/thunderylee
Summary: Prompt: sexy assassins.





	mr. and mrs. yamada

**Author's Note:**

> reposted from agck.

That _bitch_. Kame can’t believe his eyes. His sweet, beautiful wife, whom he thought ran a dating service is really an undercover assassin, whose next target was _him_.

Never mind that he’s been lying to her himself, pretending to be an uptight stockbroker when he was really out making bodies cold, but that’s besides the point. He’s a man, he’s supposed to lie.

“Come out, come out, wherever you are~” she sings sweetly from across their vast, mansion-like house. “Don’t make me shoot you.”

“You wouldn’t do that to your loving husband, would you, _Hana-chan_?” he shoots back, knowing damn well that’s not her name.

In response, a bullet flies over his head, and instantly he’s on his elbows around the side of the couch to retaliate. Pictures fall off the wall and figurines explode on the mantle, but Kame doesn’t care and he’s sure that this Meisa doesn’t either. They’re all just lies, pretend sentiments for a pretend life that neither of them want.

“I’m good at what I do, you know,” Meisa calls out cockily. “I haven’t missed a target yet.”

Kame has a passing thought that he may like her real personality better, but there’s that little matter of her trying to _kill_ him and he assesses the situation, spying a path across the rubble of overturned furniture and broken glass that will lead him right behind her. Quickly he scurries silently to the stairs, where he hops over the railing and grabs her from behind, kicking her gun out of her hand and sending it scattering across the tile floor.

“I’m good, too,” Kame hisses in her ear, the double entendre lingering in the nonexistent space between them as Kame presses against her back. “Your agency wouldn’t want me dead otherwise, right?”

His world turns upside down as she flips him over her shoulder, pinning him to the wall and punching him in the face. He fights back, pushing back his reservations about hitting a girl since she hit him first, and together they roll the rest of the way down the stairs while scrapping. Kame’s on top when they reach the landing and he takes advantage of it, using his body weight to hold her down and grabbing her wrists to keep her from attacking. Bitch packs a mean punch.

“Is that a gun in your pants or are you happy to see me?” Meisa teases, and yeah, he likes her much better now.

“It’s my gun,” he replies, shoving both of her wrists into one hand so he can grab the firearm and stick the barrel into her forehead. “You like it?”

She nods, pulling her bottom lip into her mouth with her teeth as she arches up from beneath him. “Are you going to kill me, Taro? Or should I say, _Kazuya_.”

“I could shoot you right now,” he says evenly, staring down into her eyes. He watches them fill with lust as he pushes the gun further into her skin, leaving an indent as his finger caresses the trigger guard. “Blow your beautiful brains all over this expensive carpet.”

Smiling, she reaches up to trail soft fingers along his jaw. “You were always so good to me. But you know what you never did?”

A thousand dirty scenarios cross Kame’s mind, some involving the knife that he knows is hidden in her garter as well as his gun. “What’s that?”

She elbows the gun out of the way, somersaulting them so that she’s on top, but Kame picks her up and slams her against the wall. He goes straight for the knife, dropping it to the floor where he kicks it away and leaves his hand on her upper thigh, his breath overpowering him as he stares at her.

“You never _fucked_ me,” she growls, and he shoves his hand higher to rip away her panties. He can’t open his pants fast enough, claiming her mouth with so much passion channeled from adrenaline, and she kisses him back just as fiercely.

His nose is a little tender from where she’d clocked him, but he endures it and forgets all pain and betrayal the second he’s inside her. She moans and he answers her with his own, holding her up against the wall as she wraps her legs around his waist and Meisa’s body rolls like she’s fucking him back.

It’s quick and dirty and breathless and Kame wouldn’t have it any other way, his fingers thrusting in her long, wavy hair while he thrusts inside _her_. Her body surrounds him like a glove, sucking everything out of him as he breaks out in a sweat and clings to her for balance.

Her scream nearly deafens him when she comes, but he just fucks her harder and chases his own release. It doesn’t take long, deep grunts vibrating them both as Kame feels it coming and lets it take him over. He’s still out of it when his knees give out, sending them both crashing to the floor, but his senses still tell him that Meisa’s reaching for the gun and he stretches out his arm to stop her.

“There has to be something your agency wants more than me,” Kame gasps, breath heaving as he pushes Meisa’s hair out of her face. “I’m _this_ close to nabbing Akanishi. Maybe we can… work together?”

Meisa eyes him as she struggles to catch her own breath, then smirks. “Only if you do whatever I say.”

He leans down to kiss her again, just as heated as before, and she curls her body into his. A sealed deal.


End file.
